A Quick Q&A With Eileen

We’ve taken some of your frequently asked questions and put them to one of our top psychics. Find out what answers you’ve been looking for lie ahead!

My life is at a standstill, I feel really stuck. What can I do to make myself not feel like this?

1. Decide whether you want to move forward or not. Sometimes people want to move on and build a new life, but deep down they really do not want to move on as they like to feel sorry for themselves. You can stay where you are until you are really ready for that big change and look around to see what you can do to change it.
2. Start by changing your thinking process as your thoughts will create the positive move you need. Look to changing your life by studying a subject that is close to your heart, then you will have to decide where to go further.
3. A leap of faith is needed to move you forward. Look to finding a hobby that takes you away from the normal routine things that you are doing. When you have decided what it is you would like to do, then take that leap of faith and jump.

My boyfriend tells me that he wants to keep our relationship the same as it is, but I want more. What can I do?

1. You may want more and find him impossible to shift on this one, and you could have to forgo what you want to keep him happy.
2. Ask him if he will ever want more and when he would take the relationship to a different level. His answer will give you a clear indication of what he wants from you.
3. Tell him what you want in your life and what you want from the relationship, then step back and allow him to come to you.

I am single and lonely. I feel I am ready for a relationship, but I keep meeting Mr Wrong. Is there any hope for me?

1. I can see that you have said that you are single and lonely. I feel finding something to do in a social club or starting up a hobby would bring more friends into your life. Then your loneliness would be no more.
2. A man will not fill your loneliness; you have to fulfil yourself. When you have found what you want for a social life then you will meet Mr Right ‒ as you will be in the right place.
3. Mr Wrong will always be there if you say that you are lonely. Mr Wrong will always be there if you go searching for a man. Take time to think of something to do on a social/hobby basis and you will see that Mr Right will just come into your life ‒ as you will not be lonely, but happy with yourself and your own company.

I feel I need big changes at work. I am bored and need a challenge, but I am scared to move as I feel “at least I have a job”. Should I stay or should I go?

1. Should you stay or should you go is something only you can decide, but if you are bored and in need of a challenge, your mind is already made up.
2. As you are bored you need to search for a job that will give you a challenge. When you have found that you can then decide whether to stay in the old job or move to the new one.
3. A job is a job, you are right, and why change something that earns you money for what you need. But you are bored and need something to get your teeth into, so make changes when you feel the time is right. Look around and see what is out there for you, then decide whether it is challenging enough for you to move away from the job you have.

I need to walk away from my marriage, but I am frightened of losing my security. How can I change how I feel?

1. Make a decision as to whether you are happy in your marriage and what is more important to you: happiness in life or the security of a marriage that is making you depressed.
2. You are feeling this way because you know that soon you will have to make a decision that takes you from this situation. Build up your confidence and you will soon feel better and able to move away from this situation. Make your thought that your entitlement to happiness is greater than your security in a marriage that is making you unhappy.
3. It is normal to feel this way as it is a big step to move away from the security in life, but you must see that you can now make your own security by stepping away from this, finding what you want from life and being happy.

I love my boyfriend, but he says we are just friends. We are close and intimate. How do I break this pattern? Should I leave him?

1. As you say, you love your boyfriend, but he only wants you as a friend with the benefits of sex. You need to decide whether you want to keep this relationship as it is or move away from it. Only you can make that decision. Are you worth more than being a friend with benefits?
2. He likes this as it is because he does not need to make any decisions about his life where you are concerned. You are giving him what he wants and now you have to decide if this is what you want, or you want more. When you have decided this then you can move on. He needs to value you for the person you are and want more in his life with you.
3. Decide whether you want to be his friend with benefits or whether you want a proper relationship. If you want more, tell him and then walk away so he knows that you are not going to have this relationship the way it is. If he wants you, he will come looking for you.

My wedding is in a few months, but I am having second thoughts about whether he is right for me. What should I do?

1. There are questions you need to ask yourself: Will this man be there for you whatever the circumstances? Will he protect but not control? Could you be happy with him and will he grow with you in the years you are together? If you do not feel any of the questions you are asking yourself fit, then it is time to cancel the wedding and rebook when you are ready ‒ and if you are ready.
2. You could marry him and see how you feel as it could just be pre-wedding nerves that you are having. You will find out whether you have done the right thing soon enough. Then you can move away from the situation if needs be.
3. Tell him you do not want to go through with the marriage at this time. He will listen and you two can decide whether it is the actual wedding day that is making you have second thoughts, or that you really do not love him at all. If it is the wedding day, then find a way so that only you and your man are there that day. Don’t let it go too quickly.

I have fallen out with some of my family. I am really not sure whether I should forgive and forget or just move on with my life?

1. If it feels right for you to forgive and forget so to keep the family unit together, then that is what you should do.
2. Ask yourself what it is that you need from your family, whether you could live without them and whether all the family squabbles are more than you can take. Then you will find out what it is that you need to do.
3. I expect throughout your life you have kept the peace. Therefore, it is now time for your life to move forward. I would say to you just move on with your life and when any of the family choose that they want to be part of your life then that is when you must decide whether to take them back or not. Move on, have fun.

I want to study, but I feel I am too old. Should I just go ahead or leave my life just as it is?

1. OK. How old or how young do you have to be to study? Life is full of learning, and to study at any age is keeping the brain alive as the brain thrives on learning. Pick up the books and go ahead.
2. I can’t help but feel this is what someone else has instilled in you rather than you thinking that you are too old to study. It is up to you, and you should be asking what it is that you want from life, not what everybody feels you should be doing with your life.
3. Perhaps you should ask yourself why you are questioning such a new beginning. Do you feel as though you are wasting your time because you will not be able to use what you want to study in your life or is it that you are scared of the failure if you do not pass? If you feel you haven’t got the stamina to see it through but are young at heart and want to succeed, then you will find your own way to pick up the books and study.

My boyfriend comes so close to me and opens up, then he steps back and shuts down and I do not see him for a few weeks. Should I wait or step out of the relationship?

1. Your boyfriend does not feel at this time he is ready for anything heavy in this relationship. You need to decide if you have had enough or whether it is time to move on.
2. You can hold on and wait, but what are you waiting for as he will always be like this. Your questions to yourself should be am I worth more and should I really let this go and see what happens when I do. You need to decide what you want: him or a good relationship.
3. I feel you should step back from him and when he comes forward again tell him you want more. As he really finds it hard to give you what you want you should let him go until he decides he wants more. You then go and enjoy yourself and just see what life brings you. He has to come back with a view of taking this relationship to a higher level. If he doesn’t, you move on completely.

My husband has left me saying he needs space. I want him back. What should I do?

1. Your husband saying he needs space is saying he wants his freedom, and him saying that means he really is not intending to come back just yet, or if at all. You do have to let him go and let him find what he is seeking at this time. You must not wait. He must see that you are moving on; it will help him make his mind up a lot quicker.
2. You may want him back, but at the moment he does not want that. You must let him keep the lines of communication open. You just step away and move on. That will allow him to see that he could lose you and is that something he really wants to do.
3. Be happy and allow him to see that you are happy with his decision. If you push him to staying, he will rebel. He needs to find out what it is that he needs from life and if that is you, he will be back. But ask him why he feels he needs space, why he feels that he has had enough of the marriage and what is the reason for him leaving because you will need to talk this through. If you want him, you must let him go. It will be your decision in the end as to whether you want him in your life or whether you want more.